Is Your Coach Serving You or Themself?

Is your coach serving you or themself? That’s a question you hope you never find yourself asking. And yet there is a new crop of coaches that have as their #1 goal seeing how much they can increase their fees.

This article was written 7 years ago, and when it came up in Facebook memories I realized this situation hasn’t really changed.

I’ve added a little bit of a rant on to the top of this article because I hate to see this situation getting worse instead of better.

Just a couple weeks ago friends were debating this same topic on two fronts. One was investing in high-end coaching and masterminds that end up being worthless. The other was having a coach that doesn’t really listen to what you want.

For a few years, people were being very conservative with what they invested in so you didn’t hear as much about this. Now as businesses are booming again, the cost of coaching programs have gone higher than ever before.

And now more than ever, you can’t assume that you get what you pay for…because in many cases you get very little.

It’s a Very Bad Sign

I don’t think it’s a good sign when you see big bucks coaching programs touting clients with no previous experience who are now moving from $10k to $100k and more per month selling their own coaching services even though they’ve been in business for only a few months.

From the way they advertise, it seems the focus is on teaching new coaches how to enroll and charge ever-increasing fees. No mention of the quality of service they deliver at all.

That concerns me and it should concern you if you’re looking for a coach or mentor. Or if you are a credible coach who now sees a market overflowing with people who don’t really have the background to call themselves a coach.

I’ve seen some of my friends rebel against this by either exposing the frauds in public or going in the complete opposite direction and doing an extremely low-cost membership program that gives much more value than even a $50,000 a year coaching program.

I applaud both of those models. I also support high end mentoring that teaches something specific and actionable, so you can see the value you are getting for your investment. Not just buying the hope of something working.

In full disclosure, I have never been a coach and I have never hired a coach.

Early in my business, I hired mentors for specific things I wanted to learn and I have done the same as a mentor for my private clients.

So this doesn’t affect my business, but it does affect you and I care about you getting the highest value for the money you invest.

How Experts Feel About High-End Coaching and Masterminds

About a month ago I saw a post on Facebook where someone asked who had joined a mastermind or coaching group that was over a $10k investment and would they do it again.

Well over half the entrepreneurs that answered said no, they wouldn’t. These were experts in their own right, and it was sad to see how many had been burned by high-end coaching programs.

My advice, having been in the expert business since 2001, is to have a one on one conversation with anyone you are considering a big investment and a long-term commitment with. It’s crazy that some people won’t do that until you pay them. Don’t take that kind of chance.

It’s important to be a critical thinker when you are making a big investment. Don’t get caught up in the hype of them having a big fan base or hanging out with other cool gurus you want to know.

The good old boy’s network is alive and well and they all endorse and feed off each other.

The Situation Seven Years Ago

There are a couple themes that have been coming up in strategic planning sessions I’ve been doing and also in social media and blogs I’ve been reading the last couple days.

They center around people either being unethical with their clients or basically bullying them into a “my way or the highway” box. And don’t complain or you’ll be kicked out of being one of the cool kids.

Personally, I’ve been noticing this getting more and more blatant for the last couple years and at the same time, more subversive.

It’s almost like high ticket marketers are trying to outperform each other in what they can get away with. It’s a game, all about the size of the launch, but really it looks like the same old pissing match to me.

And Where Is Serving the Client In All of This?

Nowhere that I’ve seen lately.

Is anyone trying to outdo the last guy on how much time you get with your mentor. No, most likely it’s how little.

I’ve observed a dangerous game being played of how much can I make and how little can I give.

Since when is that why we’re in business? And I’m talking about the collective we of information marketers, experts, and coaches.

When all of this was ramping up in the last couple years, I was not working much, in a place of introspection and cutting way back on business activities while I went through a divorce and deciding what I wanted my focus to be in the next phase of  my growth.

So for the most part, I felt like I was on the outside watching colleagues who were all of a sudden making big financial gains. I was very happy for them. I was excited about what I could do when I got back to work on growing my business.

But then I started hearing the inside story and it was ugly.

I started hearing from friends and subscribers, how they had bought into various high end mentoring programs glamorized from the stage at big events. And then how little, if anything, of value they were getting.

I had people calling me asking basic questions about product creation, how to get web stuff done, questions about speaking and doing events.

All of these questions were well within what should have certainly been part of these gurus mentoring programs.

But they were telling me they didn’t even have access to ask questions! And some of them had invested well over $50,000 a year for this mentoring.

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. It really made me wonder if I had the stomach to continue in my business if this is what it was going to take to “compete”. I knew it wasn’t me and I wouldn’t play the game.

In the last week, I’ve been doing a lot of strategic planning sessions as part of the package I offered on a telesummit.

Is Your Coach Making You Wrong?

The feedback has been enlightening. It confirms what I had been hearing and also brought up the situation where people are made to feel like they are wrong for not wanting to follow in lockstep with their coach.

I hear myself saying over and over on these calls that you have to create a success blueprint individually for you. Don’t get stuck in looking at what someone else is doing and put yourself in their box.

When I talk to them about how they want to live, what they’d like to spend their time doing, how they’d like to structure their business, I can hear the sigh of relief.

Apparently, they didn’t feel they had permission to create their own business, which is crazy. Up until now, they were made to feel that if they didn’t do it like everybody else there was something wrong with them.

To me, being a mentor means listening to your client and helping them come to their own conclusion of what they want and then aiding them to create it.

It’s not about pushing them into a box or taking their money and then seeing how you can have other mentees be their coach and business advisor in a so-called mastermind, so you can kick back and observe. That’s just wrong.

When I put together my package for this recent telesummit, I wondered what my colleagues would think of the fact that I was giving personal time with me as part of a $97 package.

It briefly entered my mind and then I thought, “Who cares.” I do what I enjoy in my business.

I feel like I can be of more service if I spend time personally with people. I enjoy those conversations. I love interacting with people.

My passion is serving people in a way that allows them to be more of who they really are, and to do that to the best of my ability, I like to have a part of that be a conversation.

So if you are one of the coaches or mentors that truly is of service to your clients, I salute you.

I think it’s important that we stand together against what is quickly becoming the norm of over-promising and under-delivering.

If you are a client who has been burned, I want you to know that there is a group of coaches and mentors who do have your best interest at heart.

Before you spend the big bucks in the heat of the moment at an event, talk to your new mentor one on one and see how it feels to you.

And don’t accept any excuses about hundreds of people, blah, blah, blah.

There is a way of structuring the time to be able to do it. I know this because that used to be the way it was done.

If you can’t get time to have a short conversation at the event, that should tell you something about what you’ll get later. Big red flag!

I hope my rant has given you some things to watch for next time you’re looking to invest in your personal growth or your business.

Until next time, I’d love to hear your thoughts. Just comment on this post here or on Facebook.

If you would like private mentoring, go to the contact page above and tell me what you would like help with. As your mentor, whether for your health, your lifestyle or your business, I hold a bigger vision for you than you hold for yourself. When you have faith and a team that believes in you, it gives you courage. When you don’t have to do it all yourself, all things are possible for you. Commit today to go for your dream 100%.

With over 40 years in sales and marketing, along with 45 years studying human behavior, Lynn Pierce, “The Voice of Women Empowered to Create an Ageless Body, Mind & Soul After 50” mentors soul-based entrepreneurs to reach your own personal version of success and an ageless lifestyle. Tell Lynn what the life of your dreams looks like, and she’ll create the blueprints to get you there, along with the sales system to fund it. Author of, “Breakthrough to Success; 19 Keys to Mastering Every Area of Your Life”, Lynn Pierce’s personal growth and business acceleration systems help her clients get three times the results in half the time with one-tenth of the effort. Claim your free special report, “What Do You Stand For” here